Routines: The Secret Sauce to Taming Your Tiny Human

As parents, caregivers, or anyone who works with children, we often hear about the importance of routines. But why exactly are routines so crucial, especially for young children? Well, the answer is simple: routines help kids make sense of the world. When everything is new and overwhelming, children look for some sort of order to help them feel secure.

For young kids, the world can be a big, confusing place. With everything happening around them, they’re constantly trying to make sense of their surroundings. Without a routine, a child may feel lost or completely dependent on the adults around them to figure out what comes next. But when they have a consistent routine, something remarkable happens: they begin to feel a sense of control. They know what’s coming next, which builds confidence and a sense of independence. And let's face it, what child doesn’t want to feel like they’ve got a little bit of control over their own world?

The Power of Routines and Sensitive Periods

Interestingly, routines also appeal to a child’s natural desire for order. Montessori theory teaches us about something called “sensitive periods,” which are specific windows of time in a child’s development when they are especially attuned to learning certain skills. For children between birth and age six, these sensitive periods are crucial. During this stage, children are actively trying to organize and categorize the world around them. Having a clear, consistent routine helps them in this process, making it easier for them to thrive.

The Basics of Building a Routine

So, how do we build routines that will truly support our children’s growth and development? Most routines in a child’s day revolve around key moments: mealtimes, bedtime, and getting ready for the day. While every family’s routines are a little different, here are some tips to help create consistent habits that both you and your child can rely on.

1. Leave Extra Time for Everything in the Beginning

   When you’re first starting to establish a routine, it’s important to remember that your child is learning a new process. This means they’ll need a little extra time to figure things out. At first, they’ll be looking to you to show them what comes next. This is when you’ll need to guide them through each step. Don’t rush—allow your child the space to explore the routine at their own pace. Yes, it might take a bit longer, but they’ll get the hang of it eventually, and their confidence will grow.

2. Follow a Logical Sequence

   Children thrive on routine because they like knowing what comes next. The key to a successful routine is keeping the sequence consistent. For instance, when it comes to bedtime, don’t worry about the clock so much. Start the routine at 7 p.m. (or whatever time works for you) and let the sequence unfold. Whether it takes 15 minutes or 45 minutes to finish the routine, your child will learn that once the sequence is complete, bedtime is next. They don’t need to focus on the clock—just the order of events. This helps them feel secure and independent.

3. Talk About the Routine

   Talking to your child about what you’re doing during the routine can make a world of difference. It helps them understand the process and also builds their vocabulary. For younger children, narrating your actions is incredibly helpful. For example, “First, we wash our hands. Then we sit down for dinner.” With older kids, you can have more in-depth conversations about the steps in the routine. This not only helps them understand what’s going on, but it also makes them feel included in the process.

4. Be Consistent

   Consistency is the cornerstone of any effective routine. Children need to know that they can rely on the sequence to be the same every time. If you follow the routine inconsistently, it can take much longer for your child to pick up on it or gain independence with it. For example, if you have a specific routine for going out, but only follow it some of the time, your child might become confused. It’s much easier for them to follow the routine if they know exactly what to expect, each and every time.

Wrapping It Up

At the end of the day, routines are not just about checking off a list of tasks. They’re about helping children develop a sense of order, security, and independence. When children can predict what comes next, they feel more confident in their ability to navigate the world. So whether it's mealtime, getting ready for bed, or simply getting dressed in the morning, routines provide the structure and consistency children need to grow.

With a little time and patience, your child will begin to master their routines and, along the way, build skills that will help them feel more in control of their world. And that’s something every child deserves.